Between a box and a hard place: A white trash cooking dilemma
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| Exhibits A though Ugh. |
| Photo l Felicia D’Ambrosio |
Exhibit A: My gloriously seared Cannuli Bros. pork shank, waiting to be returned to the pot to be braised.
Exhibit B-squad: A box of pink Franzia “wine” left at my house from an all-girl photo shoot. No, I will not tell you that story.
Exhibit C-list: A bottle of Holland House red-dyed “cooking wine” purchased at the Acme by my well-meaning but misguided boyfriend.
White Trash Dilemma: I’m braising this pork shank with ingredients culled only from the pantry and fridge. A can of crushed tomatoes, red pepper flakes, a few fresh bulbs of garlic and fennel, and we’re in business. The recipe calls for red wine to make up the rest of the braising liquid, and Exhibits B and C are all we have on hand. It’s cold and I’m not driving to the liquor store for six ounces of wine, and for the first time ever, we have no beer.
Which of these two losers do I use? The boxed wine is at least real alcohol, and has this fun tap on it, so it won’t be nasty and oxidized. But it’s box wine. And it’s pink. How embarassing. The Holland House swill is 100 percent fakeness, and tastes like your drunk uncle’s morning breath. Oh vomit, I just grossed myself out.
Stuck between a box and a hard place… which one would you use?






for 6 onces go with the box. You are only looking to really add some acidity and activate the alchohol soluble flavors in the tomatoes, so go with the box because of the real alchohol content. It is sweeter but that shouldnt be a problem with red pepper flakes and garlic. Cooking wine is the devil because it is spiked with salt and preservatives.
box wine, all the way. anthony said it all…all the worst qualities of the wine will be burned off any way.